Cancer's Ass has Been Kicked... AGAIN!!!

Whoooo Hoooo! Everybody get ready for the party of all parties because Tommy Boy has done it again! He has kicked this cancer's ass and we couldn't be happier or more proud! Monday's PET scan shows no signs of cancer meaning our dad is in remission... a word we never thought we would hear in January. We feel so blessed and so grateful that we are able to bring this great news to you all.

The past nine months have been a wild ride on this roller coaster called cancer treatment-- but we managed to hang on tight and get through it together. Thank you all so much for your love, prayers, support and a BIG thanks to all of you who were on our Warrior Healing team that did the 7 & 7 with us everyday. I truly believe that played a major role in getting us where we are today in combination with an amazing patient, a top notch team of doctors, and finding the right medicines all put us on the other side of this thing. I think I will still be doing my 7 & 7 -- maybe just visualizing someone guarding my dad's body making sure no more bastard cancer cells come near it again! :)

Keep your eye out for info on the blog for the party details... it will be in September and you have to be here!

Thank you all again... we could not have done this with out you!
~Whitney

Chemo: Round 6 of 6!

Today was Tommy Boy's 6th and last chemo infusion! Whooo hoooo! He will continue with the chemo pill that goes along with it for the next 3 weeks... and then we will do another PET scan to check again where we are at and then determine where to go from there. We will meet with Dr. Ko at UCSF on June 16th to cover the PET results and have him weigh in on where we go. (Either just wait for 3 months (with no meds) and scan again to make sure non of the cancer has come back, or continue with the chemo pill every other week kind of indefinitely.) So we will see what happens next. But this is an exciting milestone to reach! And I know my dad is glad to finally be on the other side of all of this.

I went down and brought lunch to eat with my dad today in the chemo lounge... that was a first for me. I am glad I got to go check it out and see what he has been doing regularly since October! He got the corner seat he likes, so that was good... and we enjoyed a little Panda Express together :) It was kinda fun. I was glad it wasn't too crowded... there were only 2 or three other patients in there so I didn't feel like I was in the way.

Let's see... what else? My dad has been keeping busy despite the fatigue that comes along with the chemo pill. He got another chunk of melanoma (maybe pre-melanoma?) excised off his back... so his body was working hard to heal him after that mini little surgery. And then he jacked his back up rafting right before that, so his poor back was giving him a heck of a time... PLUS his white blood cell count was super low, so he was having to go in and get shots for a few days to get those numbers back up. So all of those things combined definitely made for one tired Tommy Boy-- but you wouldn't know it from him. He is still go-go-go and does everything he can to get things done he wants to get done. He does not do well with sitting around and "resting"-- but he did for a couple of days, so that was good. Sounds like he is on the mend in all of those aspects-- so hopefully this will be a good few weeks for him. Keep your fingers crossed.

Please continue with the prayers, love and support. I know that it is our 7:00a & 7:00p warrior healing times that are making Tommy Boy Kick Cancer's Ass... so please keep it up! We are forever grateful!

Will keep you all posted... stay tuned!

~Whit

P.S. I forgot to mention that my dad and Renee had a BLAST on their dive trip. My dad was feeling like a million bucks (other than being cold) and did a ton (TON!) of dives. You can red the comment Renee left in the last blog. It sounded like the trip was perfect and they are looking into planning another one soon!

More Good News!

Tommy Boy had another PET Scan last week after he finished his 4th cycle and we had an appt to go over the results with Dr. Javeed on Monday. The good news is the cancer is still continuing to shrink, and is remaining less active. The spots on the lung and the liver are still completely resolved (no trace of cancer) and now we can add the affected (or is it effected?) lymphnode to the resolved list! The main tumor in the esophagus/stomach junction has continued to decrease in activity, and the spoton the left femur also has slowed down in activity! Yay, yay, yay and yay! Looks like we have all kept up on our 7 & 7... and it has paid off! :) Sooo... please continue to do so- because it is WORKING!

In other news... my dad and Renee leave Friday night for thier dive trip in Cozumel. My dad's plan is to do something crazy, like 17 dives in the 5 days they can dive! Luckily he is feeling pretty good and has some energy back since he hasn't had a chemo infusion for 3 weeks. So keep him and Renee in your prayers while they are gone and fingers crossed my dad has enough energy to do all he wants to do!

Thanks again everyone for all of your continued prayers and support!
~Whitney

Walking on clouds...

Now that our dad is on the road to healthier days I can't help but feel such gratitude in every second that I have my eyes open. Hearing the news last week that my dad is getting better - lifted literally a million pounds off my shoulders. I know that what was going on since Sept had been weighing on me but I had no idea just how much until it was released last Tuesday. Now the everyday trials and annoyances can be tackled that much easier - and I can even face them with a smile...

I know I don't say much on this blog - mainly because I have two amazing sisters that just take care of sending out the news for me...but I feel like I have so much say yet I can't really find the words to express exactly what I'm feeling. Mostly just happiness- elated happiness and relief. I can breath now. I no longer have constant anxiety and aggression. And when I did have those things - I didn't even realize it...I feel like now that my dad has another chance at life - or just a longer life than we were expecting - I can live my life now/again.

Now anyone who knows my dad knows that feeling this way is ridiculous and he would be completely pissed if anyone's "life" was put on hold because of his...but then anyone who knows Tow Ewing would find it impossible to continue on with their lives as if nothing was wrong. So being the youngest daughter of the greatest man alive - I can too easily put my life on hold when I find out that this amazing man's life could soon just be a memory.

But I don't want to have to "explain" to my future kids how awesome their grandpa was - no way - not gonna happen. They are going to know first hand just how great is. He's going to be the best fricken grandpa ever because he's the best dad ever. He's the best friend ever - brother, son, neighbor, employee, you name it, he's the best. And someone up there knows that there is too much going on down here for him to miss out on. (Thanks up there, by the way)

I am a believer - and I am extremely selfish. I want my dad to be better and I want my dad to stick around. So at 7 & 7 everyday - I picture my dad's cancer being plucked out the earth like carrots by a rabbit. (Little bunny Fufu) It's something someone told me that worked for a cancer patient - and it if worked for them, I'll try it too. And in my mind - it's working. I also picture my future and he's with me the whole way. The power of positive thinking works incredibly...this is proof.

I also know that I would not be able to fathom going through something like this with out the family and support group that I am blessed to have. I am truly the luckiest person in world to have the family I have. I don't even have to talk to them for them to know how I'm feeling - they know, and they pray, and they love unconditionally. Now that's family.

So I'm ending this little blog with the note of hope - I have hope today and I will always have hope from now on. I love everyday now - my cheeks have been sore for the past week because I can't stop smiling!!

"More than a miracle... phenomenal"

Those are the exact words we heard Dr. Javeed say today! We finally got the good news we have been waiting for since September 15th! Hallelujah! So glad to write a blog where I am excited for the news!

So here's the deal... the tumor in the esophagus at the stomach junction decreased in size and the activity level is now the same as background cells (low activity... which is FAB!) The lymph node near the esophagus also decreased in size, the new tumors/nodules on the lungs and liver have resolved... meaning they are GONE!! And the spot on the femur is moderately better with decreased activity too. Dr. Javeed had nothing but optimism and good news for us today.

He told us that he has never seen someone respond so well and hasn't ever been able to give this good of report to a patient. Truly, truly, truly AMAZING! Me, Taylor, Renee and Sheryl all had tears of joy as we processed what great news this was. I know we have to be thankful for the doctors and the drugs... but really I think it is all of us killing the damn cancer at 7 & 7 that really made the results so astounding. Soooo... let's keep it up because clearly what we are doing is working.

Our dad starts his next round of EOX on Monday, and will complete two more cycles before the next PET scan (in about six weeks.) So hopefully this good news will become a trend. I told the girls in the office that we are now going to become greedy and expect good news every time we come! :)

This is for sure the news we have hoped for... maybe even better than we were praying for. And we thank God for listening to us all while we demanded that he heals our dad/brother/uncle/friend. So let's keep demanding it. Thank you all for the love, support, prayers and being on the Healing Warrior train.

Love you all... here's to kicking some more cancer ass!
~Whitney

Fingers Crossed for Ggood News After Monday's PET Scan

Our dad goes in on Monday for another PET Scan to see whats been going on since he has completed the first 2 cycles of EOX. We have an appointment on Tuesday afternoon with Dr. Javeed to get the results... keep your fingers crossed we get some good news.

Some promising signs that we may get good news is that Tommy Boy has been able to eat TONS better than he was before he started this new chemo. He is finally gaining weight and able to eat with out tons of pain... so we are so so glad about that.

I like to think that this is in part because of all of us doing the 7 & 7 focused energy and visualizing killing my dad's cancer. I would really like to be able to put "Cancer Killer" on my resume! :) I know there are a lot of us doing the 7am and 7pm visualizing... and that we have super heroes, base ball bats, spaghetti strings, St. Michael, and cancer killing spray all going in to Tommy's esophagus (and other organs) twice a day to kick some cancer ass! What else do we have out there? Share... if you would like! Its kind of fun knowing what other people think about when they are contributing to this effort to kill the cancer!

In other news... the fam has booked a trip to Cabo San Lucas the week before Christmas. My dad and all of us are super pumped for some sun (and diving for some of us) and to being together for the holidays. And he and Renee booked a dive trip to Cozumel in April. I hope Renee is not expecting a lounging by the pool, laying out in the sun kind of vaca... our dad has total ADD when it comes to laying around- even if he is on vacation. I know he has LOTS of dives on the agenda, so that will keep them busy!

Thanks again to everyone for keeping all of us in your thoughts and prayers and for the focused energy at 7 & 7... I am so very hopeful that this (along with the chemo) is doing the trick! We'll keep you posted and let you know on Tuesday if we are right!

~Whitney

Join Team Ewing and help us Heal Tommy Boy!

We have the best family EVER! Over the weekend Peggy drove up from Paso Robles to hang with us and Jenny opened up her house for us all to get together and Eric cooked the most amazing feast of deleicious Mexican food. And then to top it all off... Sheryl and Peggy spent the entire day on Sunday cooking delicious food packed with protien (with extra protien powder) to help keep Tommy Boy's weight up... so he never has to think about what he is going to eat. He has a fridge and freezer full of perfectly packaged meals of things he likes. Our family is amazing!

Speaking of amazing... Sheryl sent out and email to the entire Ewing clan asking everyone to get on board the healing train. We LOVED the idea and wanted to share it with everyone else that is following the blog to see if we can get our "Warrior Team" healing our dad. Please read the email below and set your alarms to help us fight this bastard cancer. (Thanks again Aunt Sheryl for letting me post this to the blog and for getting this team of warriors created!)

Dear Family & Friends,


As you all know, Tom’s cancer has metastasized to his lung, liver and leg and right now all the treatment must be focused on a remission! This journey is going to take not just his doctors and his daughters but ALL of us. Here are my thoughts (yes, you might think I am crazy – but stay with me):


I want to create an army of healing warriors to help in Tom’s fight and this is how I hope to do this. At the same time EVERY day all of us will STOP what we are doing and spend 10 seconds in focusing healing thoughts directly to Tom. The specifics will be that you must use your mind to create an image of something killing his cancer cells – each and every one of them. How? – well, pick your favorite image – i.e. Pacman gobbling up cancer cells; a very large mean marine with a huge gun blasting them away, one at a time, or my favorite – St Michael the Archangel on his white steed with his huge sword chopping off the head of the cancer dragons – anyway, you get the idea – choose an image of something that works for you. When you stop to focus your thoughts with your warrior image killing the cancer cells, really SEE it happening. I know this may sound a little crazy (and REALLY not at all like me) but this is what I know for sure:


1 – Everything in this world contains energy – it is in all of us – it can be manipulated and transformed but it never goes away

2 – Our minds have more power to heal us than we can possible imagine but we just don’t know how to use it

3 – All of this energy comes to us from God and we can channel it – Mom knew exactly how to do this and I believed in her completely

4 - God will help those who help themselves

5 - There is great power in numbers – if each one of us can focus in and channel just a tiny bit of this healing energy – just think of the effect of 50 or more of us.

6 – Tom must believe in the power of God working through all of us to heal him and he must imagine killing this cancer too.

7 – We need to focus our prayers to doing more than asking for a miracle (we can do that too) we need to focus our energy directly to Tom.

8 – If you are uncomfortable with the thought of a killing warrior then use your prayer energy to imagine his healthy cells growing to defend against this horrible cancer

9 – The power of people who love Tom focused at exactly the same time everyday will be an immeasurable help to getting a remission.


WE CAN DO THIS!!!! COMMITT TO BEING A HEALING WARRIOR.


Right now we think that 7:00 am and 7:00 pm would work (yes, that means weekends too). We can accomplish this be setting our phone alarms (all of us older folks can have one of our kids do this) to go off everyday. If there is a better time, let me know.

I want to get started ASAP – there is no time to loose.


Love you all,


Aunt Sheryl





Sound good everyone? Want to joing our team? Thank you all again for your continued prayers and support... we are so grateful for all of you and would not be able to get through this difficult time with out all of you.

Love and hugs,
Whit

The Latest

I so wish I was writing this update with fabulous news on the treatment front for our dad... but unfortunately that's not the case. We are still doing all that we can to remain optimistic and keep positive... but we are going to need the prayers and the positive mojo to go into overdrive with the latest news we have received. Just before the holidays we met with the surgeon and talked about either continuing with more chemo or going straight to surgery... we played the waiting game for quite a while with lots of doctors out of the office for the 2 weeks over the holidays. My dad got the last round of chemo and then the team of doctors (that seems to be getting bigger and bigger... which is great to have so many smart minds all talking about what’s best for my dad) decided to do one more PET scan and determine from there if they would go straight to surgery (if the cancer wasn't shrinking) or do one more round of chemo (if the tumor was responding well to the treatments.)

When we went in for the PET scan results we were super bummed to learn that the cancer is not only not responding to the chemo... but it has spread and is more active. They found a new spot on his liver and a new spot on his left femur... never what you want to hear from an oncologist. The doctors have come to the conclusion that because this is a "radiation induced tumor" (meaning, the radiation he received for the Hodgkin's Disease 20 years ago, caused this cancer-- how lame... right?!!) it is drug resistant, aggressive, and clever... it is finding away to keep thriving despite the drugs being pumped into Tommy Boy (what BASTARD cancer cells!) SO what does all that mean??

It means that curing this is no longer an option. Surgery is off the table... and we try to manage the bastard cells taking over. We meet with Dr. Ko at UCSF on Thursday and will learn more about what this means and what our dad's quality of life will be like. We are all feeling like we got punched in the stomach and a little pissed that we really can't seem to catch a break with this. My dad is still his same old self... and being our rock (go figure?!) Thank goodness he can hold it together... because it’s hard for us to at some points. He started a new chemo yesterday... and this one is supposed to be pretty gnarly (horrible side effects, and kind of just going to beat him up for about 6 weeks). So please pray that this chemo kicks some cancer ass... and that my dad tolerates it well... and that we can all remain optimistic despite the bleakness of the situation.

Thank you all so so so much for all of the love and support you have given us thus far... and for continuing it was we trudge down this new road of managing this bullshit cancer, instead of curing it.

Lots of love,
Whitney

A new year :)

Happy New Year!

I know a lot of you have been waiting on an update... I think we have all been trying to figure out the best way to communicate the overwhelming lack of information. The good news is there is no bad news - so, that's a start :)

Dad finished up his second round of chemo then had a PET scan to see if this chemo was working. Esophageal cancer is typically treated with a chemo cocktail called EOX. Remember when we found out that the weird thing on the lung was lung cancer (that was fun...)? Well, we also found out that the results of the DNA testing meant to assess his tumor's resistance to certain chemos determined that EOX would likely not work for dad's stubborn bastard tumor. So, the think tank decided to go with something different. We took a "calculated risk" and decided to try a less conventional chemo mix in the hopes that this one would do the trick.

Dr. Ko (UCSF GI Oncologist) was only comfortable with this approach if we agreed to do 2 rounds, then a PET. If the PET didn't show the results we wanted then he'd do 2 rounds of EOX before surgery. The DNA testing to show a tumor's resistance is still very new so Dr. Ko isn't completely sold on relying on this test 100%. He relies on the data and the tests and the fact that EOX usually works.

So the PET -- looks like this chemo is working on the lung (which we really weren't too concerned with anyway since the surgeon could take out that entire chunk during the esophagus surgery). The esophageal tumor, however, shows no signs of improvement. Same size, no metabolic activity change. It's hard not to see this is disappointing, but Dr. Jablons (UCSF Surgeon) made a really good point: "You have to stop the freight train before you can back it up." So no news is actually good news? It could have been bigger or more active. No reaction is actually a sign of the cancer responding to this treatment.

We're still sort of in a holding pattern because Dr. Javeed (primary oncologist in Folsom) and Dr. Jablons are leaning toward doing the surgery right away. The rationale for this being that if the chemo isn't taking care of the cancer then getting it out is the best way to ensure we don't waste another minute.

Dr. Ko is on vacation so we'd like to chat with him before deciding on surgery now or not. Since dad is handling the chemo so well he decided to do another round of this one while we wait for Ko to come back and make his recommendation.

So it looks like surgery won't happen until early February at the soonest. We will be sure to update everyone as soon as we talk to Dr. Ko - he's our favorite and the most likely to give us some nice pearls of wisdom and hope :)

Love you all -- extremely grateful for the support and prayers!

xoxo,

~kyle

Appointment Moved to Friday....

Hey guys... sorry I forgot to keep you posted! The follow up with Javeed to get the PET scan results got moved to Friday. Keep your fingers crossed for us for just a little while longer.

Oh... and stay tuned for pictures of Tommy Boy's shaved head. Taylor is shaving hers tomorrow in support. We'll post those too. (haha... just kidding!)

~Whit

PET Scan on Monday

Sooo the first two cycles of chemo are done and now its time to do another PET to see if this chemo cocktail is doing the trick and kicking this cancer's ass. Tommy Boy goes in for the PET on Monday, then we'll go meet with Dr. Javeed on Wednesday to see what the PET showed.

Originally the plan was to do 2 cycles, scan again, then either continue with the current cocktail if it is in fact shrinking for the last remaining cycle, OR if it isn't shrinking to then do 2 cycles of the other cocktail (EOX). But the last time our dad was in getting chemo Dr. Javeed said that him and Dr. Jablons (the surgeon at UCSF) think they will just go straight to surgery if its not working. Not really sure how I feel about that... but I guess I am not Dr. Kahn. But I definitely want to hear what our oncologist at UCSF, Dr. Ko, has to say about it. If he agrees, then I will feel better.

We also meet with Dr. Jablons on the 22nd to go over pre-op stuff for whenever he does have the surgery. I am excited for that appointment because the other 2 times we have been down to UCSF we have left feeling really really good about things. The doctors there are just incredible, and it is the BEST feeling to know our dad is in such good hands.

Keep you fingers crossed the PET brings us good news... and we will definitely keep you posted! Thanks again to everyone for all of your thoughts and prayers... we are so lucky to have all of you in our lives.
~Whitney

A Very Ewing Thanksgiving

We had such a wonderful Thanksgiving -- it was pure magic from beginning to end :) Not only was it a great turn out (47 people in total!!!), but the food was incredible (thanks to the FABULOUS cooks), Danny and Nicole's house looked absolutely beautiful and the entertainment was first class. The kids entertained us all with a talent show -- just like the good ol' days at Grammy and Papa's. We also carried on with our new tradition of "Thankful Leaves" ~ everyone took some time to write down what they were thankful for this year and we all took turns reading them aloud through out the night. So grateful for our family and our time together... so grateful for the opportunity to create wonderful new memories with our ever growing family. We are truly blessed. I can't imagine a more perfect time to reflect on our blessings and give thanks.

Thank you all for your love and support -- special thanks to our family for giving us all exactly what we needed at exactly the right time.

~kyle, whitney & taylor

"Gratitude is the memory of the heart." ~Jean Baptiste Massieu

good news :)

Dad was supposed to go in for chemo today which would have actually sucked because he'd start feeling pretty bad around Friday and through our long Thanksgiving weekend. They called him today and said he should enjoy the weekend and go in for the poison on Monday - woohoo :)

We've got quite the agenda for the weekend so this is truly great news! Everyone is doing their own thing Thursday and we are all meeting up on Friday in Paso Robles for Thanksgiving part deux. We are looking to have a serious turnout for this Ewing family get together. Last count was 48 and growing - and when I say growing, I mean it quite literally. By the time Friday comes, 8 more of my cousins will probably be pregnant - hard to believe there are so many grand babies now... i kinda love it :) I am so looking forward to being surrounded by my entire family - will be missing Mike and Ash, Scott, Kelly and Collin and Matty Boy, but the rest of the crew should be there.

It will be perfect - dad can get a little soul food this weekend - lots of love and laughter, then go in and beat the hell out of the tumor on Monday!



And - as promised... here are the place cards that we worked on last weekend - cutest ever, huh?

Happy Thanksgiving to all... I know I've got a lot to be thankful for - the love and support of friends and family for one.

I'm going to spend some time tomorrow being thankful I'm at the spa instead of work, that the weather is gorgeous when it could easily be raining, that I get to see my family Friday when I never expected everyone to come and especially that I landed where I did - in life, with this crew... when I could have easily been born to anyone else :) lucky me!

~kyle

Accessorizing...

Dad's feeling good. I saw him today at Whit's and he looks pretty good too! It has become clear quite quickly that the chemo has not gotten the best of Tom Ewing :)

We (the girls) were getting crafty and working on the place cards for Thanksgiving, thinking out loud about ways to get a hold of some twigs (should we just buy cinnamon sticks, can Taylor scrounge some up in her hood?). Next thing you know, there goes my dad. Out the door and up a tree. Whitney's birch tree out front. He pruned the heck out of it then proceeded to cut us 40 perfect bundles for our random crafty idea.

We took it inside and worked out a nice assembly line. Whitney stamping, dad embossing, me on handwriting, Taylor and Renee tying the twine. We will be sure to post pics of the gorgeous, eco-friendly, sustainable place cards once they are complete - they were definitely a labor of love!

Also - Whitney gave us these gorgeous necklaces today with St. Joseph (the patron Saint of fathers), an angel wing and a locket. She gave dad a bracelet with some other saint that is the patron saint of cancer patients (or maybe it's just cancer?). He wasn't totally pumped on wearing a bracelet and said he'd keep it in his wallet (this was so not OK with Whitney). Whitney argued that this was a very manly bracelet - I considered this a bit of an oxymoron (Ryan agreed this was 100% an oxymoron - potentially even more so than "jumbo shrimp"). When he came by this afternoon, Whitney asked if he was wearing it and he was. Up above his watch with the charm tucked in between the velcro of his watch band so it didn't dangle. Hilarious.

It was so nice to be together. We had a really good today :)

~kyle

Keep that mojo acomin!

I've been talking to Dad the last few days and he says he's been feelin kinda crappy.

This is the scarey part for me - I feel like a kid again when he went through this twenty years ago.... completely helpless. I've heard of parents wanting to make their kids better when their sick and this is exactly how I feel right now. Everyone knows that our dad is everything to us. Everything. A best friend, coach, river guide, mechanic, carpenter, hair stylist, seamtress, peanut butter and jelly maker. You name it- Dad is the first person we think of who can do it, and do it right - the first time.

He is still kicking cancer's ass, but it looks like may need Dad some chearleaders (don't tell him I said anything) yelling "Defense! Defense!"and"Be Aggressive! Be Be Aggressive!"

The not so blogger,
Taylor

Update from Chemo Round 2

I just got a call from my dad as he was leaving chemo.

Dad: Hi honey, just wanted to call you and let you know that I'm leaving chemo and I feel so good I'm going to go get Panda

(note to reader: i'm pretty sure that panda express would be my father's final meal if he were getting the chair tomorrow which is hilarious, but sweet and simple and i kinda love it. we knew things were bad when even Panda wasn't working for him a few weeks ago).

Me: That's awesome - so you don't feel terrible or you actually feel good?

Dad: I feel good.

Me: So, like you are the rare person who randomly loves chemo and feels like a million bucks after?

Dad: I don't know if I'd quite say that...

But, he is feeling good and is clearly in good spirits. The nurse said that he shouldn't expect to feel any worse than he did the first time around as far as nausea goes, but that he might experience more fatigue than in the past.

So far, so good :)

~Kyle
(not quite the bloggin fool whitney is, but give me some time...)

A Little Something Pollyanna Taught Me...

**Note to Reader: This is very "bloggish" and this is Whitney... so of course this is going to be long winded. There are no real updates on my dad in this post other than that he's feeling better than he expected after the first round of chemo (although the nurses say the third day after is usually when you really start feeling crappy... so we'll see how he is tomorrow) and will have his next infusion on Thursday. Ready for the fluffy stuff? Here it is:

Everyone has seen Pollyanna... right? OMG- I LOVED this movie when I was little (and all of the Disney Classics in this same Haley Mills genre... do you even know how many times I have seen The Parent Trap?) and part of it has really always stuck with me. In the movie she is orphaned and sent to live with her mean, rich aunt... and is always playing "The Glad Game" -- where she looks for something to be glad about in every situation (no matter how crappy it is). Here is a little synopsis I copy and pasted about it from Wikipedia:
"Pollyanna's philosophy of life centers on what she calls "The Glad Game", an optimistic attitude she learned from her father. The game consists of finding something to be glad about in every situation. It originated in an incident one Christmas when Pollyanna, who was hoping for a doll in the missionary barrel, found only a pair of crutches inside. Making the game up on the spot, Pollyanna's father taught her to look at the good side of things—in this case, to be glad about the crutches because "we don't need 'em!". "

Soooo anyways... Like I said- this has always stuck with me and I have found myself always playing this game in my head when something crappy happens. I mean if Pollyanna can become paralyzed and be "glad" that at least she had legs... then I can usually find something pretty easily when the going gets tough. Since all of this Cancer stuff has been going on I have been trying my darnedest to stay positive, and look for the bright side because if my dad can do it and he's the one who actually has the cancer, then I should definitely buck up and not be some kind of Negative Nancy about all of this. BUT with all of the set backs there have been, and new random cancers that pop up, it has been a bit more difficult to not just be pissed off at the world and like scream at someone who says their dog is dying to GET OVER IT!! YOU CAN BUY A NEW ONE! Soooooo I have been very actively playing The Glad Game like it is my job so I don't have a million enemies... and here are somethings that have kept me focused with a smile on my face:

I am Glad That...
- I have a dad that I am so obsessed with... some people have dead beat dads or dads that beat the crap out of them when they were younger. I am glad I am my dad's daughter...
- my Dad comes from an amazing family that has helped raise us and been with us every step of the way on this journey and will always be there.
- I have my sisters... I can only imagine how hard this would be if I were an only child.
- my grandparents an my dad taught me the power of being surrounded by your family... since all of this started happening I feel my body sometimes aching for my sisters, my cousins, my aunts, and my uncles... I am so grateful for them.
- my Dad has the BEST attitude ever through out all of this... I cannot imagine going through this if he was down in the dumps, or not ready to fight the good fight. I don't think my dad has spent one second feeling sorry for himself... I think he is more worried about the 3 of us girls than he is about anything else.
- we all can have a sense of humor about this... my dad is definitely dealing with a lot of this with jokes. The other night me, Kyle, Ryan and my dad were playing Scattegories and my dad was putting some bogus answers we were disputing... and his response would be, "but I have Cancer..." and he officially gets to keep the point. :)
- we have an amazing team of doctors on our side who already love my dad.
- my dad has Renee in his life... despite him calling her his "current squeeze" as if there is another chick waiting in the wings, she puts up with him and is really really good for him.
- Ryan and I bought our new house and we are not only super close to all of my dad's doctors, but that we have room to have him and my sisters, aunts, uncles, whoever, stay over when they are in town and we can all be cozy.
- this whole process has really made me realize I can't take any of the time we have hear on earth for granted. I want to soak in every minute and live life as fully as I can.
- (this is totally morbid... BUT) my dad has a great prognosis... I can't imagine not having a dad. I can't imagine how people function that don't get to say good bye... if there was a car accident or something. I am glad that we now know how precious every minute is with my dad and have the opportunity to say things we may not have said if we thought he was going to be here forever... (totally morbid, I know... but hopefully it makes sense.)
- I believe in the power of prayer and that I know lots of people are sending lots of prayers up for us... I think this whole thing would be a lot harder to deal with I didn't believe in a higher power.
- my grandparents and Joey are up in heaven telling The Big Man that Tom's Girls need him to be here for many, many, many, more years... and I know he's listening.
- all of us are surrounded by tons of friends and family that love us and are rooting for us every step of the way.

And more selfishly... I am glad that:
- all of this cancer stuff started after my dad practically remodeled our new house (the 3 of us girls are beyond spoiled when it comes to our dad fixing/making/helping with any and everything... and he pretty much made our new house a home by putting in amazing laminate flooring, scraping our popcorn ceiling and re-texturizing them... and they are vaulted! They look amazing! Oh... and he helped with the move, painting, decorating, pretty much everything from start to finish... I told you, I'm spoiled!)
- my dad is letting me be a complete control freak about appointments, prescriptions, going to appointments, etc... its the only way I feel like I am doing *something* that can help get him better.
- if this was going to happen... that it happened when it did. Had it been going on a few months or even weeks earlier, I would have probably had a mental breakdown dealing with the summer craziness at work and somehow trying to get to all of these doctors appointments and make all of these phones calls. Which brings me to the next thing I am glad for...
- I work where I do. They have been so amazing during all of this... they don't bat an eye when I need to come in late or leave early or take a sick day. Speaking of sick days...
- I had almost 300 hours of sick time on the books... so I don't have to be the least bit stressed when I do have to take time off.
- I have an amazing husband who has been incredible through all of this... he knows when I need to cry, need someone to listen, need to be left alone, or when I just need a hug. I am glad that he loves my dad.
- "The Glad Game" really works for me... and always has. ;)


And there ya have it folks... a little something I learned from Pollyanna. Even when it seems like the whole world is crapping on you, you can always be glad that at least it isn't diarrhea. (ewww... not really sure why I am ending it that way-- but it kind of cracked me up in a gross way!) :) haha

Oh... and one last quote from the book Pollyanna that her dad told her to remember:
"When you look for the bad expecting it, you will find it."


~Whitney... serious blogger

Text from Chemo... Day 1

"Got the corner seat. Going good."

So glad to hear it! So glad the ball is rolling!

Score!

After 6 unsucessful phone calls in trying to find a flu shot for the pops... we found a hook up! My friend Becca's mom is the Head ER Nurse at a local hospital and Becca offered to call her mom to see if she could track one down for my dad. And as luck would have it, her mom agreed to slip him one on the DL... GENIUS! Its so awesome having all of these little connections everywhere! Thanks Becca and thanks to your mom!

~Whitney the Blogging Fool

Tommy Boy Needs a Manicure!

We met with Mindy, the chemo nurse today to go over what the infusions will be like and what side effect he can expect. Both Mindy and Dr. Javeed stressed the importance of using some type of Nail Strengthener on his nails (the mentioned that Sally Hanson one, Tough as Nails...) and my dad got big laughs by asking why he couldnt use a colored nail polish. (For those of you that have ever seen my dad's hands, you are probably cracking up just envisioning my dad's hands with nail polish on them.) Anyways... it was a good appointment, I think my dad knows what to expect and he was glad to hear the the chemo drugs he received 20 years ago (MOP) was probably a lot harder on him than this will be. The "chemo lounge," as I've dubbed it, was PACKED today! Not an empty seat in the house... but I was glad to see some more lively folks in the lazy boys today. Every other time I have walked passed it, it has always made me super super depressed because everyone looks to be about 98 years old, and literally look like they are on thier death beds (it doesn't bother my dad... just me. He thinks he will find a buddy to play cribbage with.) But today there was lots of people chatting, lots of younger, healthier looking peeps, and more smiles in general, which made me feel way better.

He goes in tomorrow at 9:45a for his first round... and fingers crossed there will be another lively bunch like today- and who knows, maybe he'll even get the chair he wants? And then there is another appointment tomorrow afternoon with Dr. O'Malley, the surgeon who did the Port Placement to make sure all is well with the healing of the incision site and just the port in general (aka my dad's 3rd nipple as he likes to call it.) So it'll be a busy productive day. I think all of us, my dad included, are just really excited to get this whole thing started. It seems like September 15th was a lifetime ago already!

Thanks again for all of the support... we love you all!

~Whitney the Blogger :)